While good looks can get you noticed and money can get you places, it’s ultimately your personality that’ll determine whether a woman will stay for more. Unlike men who choose potential partners based on looks first and personality second, women place a premium on personality over other elements of attraction.
Unfortunately for us men, we have the tendency to overlook this important facet of attraction. While most of us mean well, we can be really dense when it comes to knowing which character traits we possess keep us from landing the girls that we like.
In that regard, we’d like to share some behaviors that tend to turn Filipina women off. Our hope is that being aware of these things can help you tone them down, increasing your chances of taking things to the next level with the ladies. While we’re not suggesting that you change who you are, we do want to emphasize the fact that there’s always room for refinement in our personalities. Here we go:
By definition, misogyny is the hatred, dislike, contempt or prejudice against women. While woman haters are very rare in Philippine society and educated men recognize women as equals, there are still some guys who just don’t get it. Worse, a lot of misogynistic men aren’t even aware that they’re that way.
Essentially, if you think of women as anything other than your equals, you probably have a little misogyny in you. If you have the tendency to treat them as trophies or commodities, you’re not just a jerk – you’re also misogynistic. If you make explicit statements that women are any less capable than you are intellectually or professionally, then you’re a 100% certified misogynistic person who needs an attitude adjustment.
Keep in mind that we all have mothers and most of us have sisters. While men and women aren’t wired the same way, we have our respective strengths and limitations. Instead of making misogynistic statements to a woman you want to date, try looking at the things that make the opposite sex special and important. You’ll be far better off talking about that with her.
2. Liar, Liar
Honesty is among the most cherished of human behavioral traits. It’s the foundation upon which trust is built and it’s the glue that holds relationships together. If you’re trying to make progress when dating a woman, the last thing you’ll want to show her is dishonesty in any form. Regardless if it’s in the form of fibbing or lying through your teeth about important things, dishonesty is a non-starter for most women once they detect it.
Whether you’re in the process of getting a woman, actively dating her or even when you’re in a relationship, make sure to be as honest as you possibly could. Pretending to be something you’re not or hiding things from her can only breed distrust which leads to bigger issues. More importantly than that, try not to do things that you can’t be proud of and would compel you to lie about to her. The less baggage you have, the easier it is to be honest.
3. Being Metrosexual
A metrosexual man is a straight guy who happens to be especially meticulous about his grooming and appearance. He has the tendency to take particularly long insde the bathroom and even longfer in front of a mirror. He’s very concerned about being in style and avoids situations where he looks less than his absolute best in public.
While looking good is certainly something every woman can appreciate in a man, it should be done within what most people would consider normal. If you take longer than a girl to rdess up and groom yourself, you’re sending the implicit message that you’re more kikay than her.
Although metrosexual men aren’t necessarily gay, Filipino culture tends to confuse one with the other due to the grooming rituals involved. While you may be 100% heterosexual and secure in your manliness, the last thing you’d want to happen is for your lady friend and the people around her to think that you’re not.
At the very least, being metrosexual may give a woman the feeling that she’s perpetually underdressed and under-groomed while she’s with you. This can lead to her feeling less than attractive, or it might pressure her to doll up more to keep up with you. If you fit the metrosexual description, you’ll want to keep things in moderation so you can continue to look the way you want to while not alienating the object of your affection.
4. Talking Too Much
Good conversations are essential to making progress with a girl. Having engaging, witty and flirty talks with her can help put her at ease, build a little trust and make her even more interested in you. Most men are aware of this and we have the tendency to initiate talks to get things flowing between us and the women that we like.
Unfortunately, not all conversations are equal. If you’re too concerned about initiating verbal exchanges, there’s a good chance you’ll end up talking an lot and monopolizing the conversation. Barely letting the girl talk while you blabber on about yourself and your ideas can send all the wrong signals to a lady.
Talking too much makes you look egotistical, self-absorbed and inconsiderate of the people around you. Most women don’t appreciate those imlicit character traits and may decide to walk away even when you’re not really any of those things. Remember that most ladies appreciate men who listen and understand what they have to say. They like it even more when you can genuinely appreciate their intellect based on your conversations.
For best results, try to find a nice middleground between being too passive and being a chatterbox. Make sure to ask questions and pay attention to what she says. From time to time, share things about yourself. Find stuff that you have in common to talk about and once in a while, throw in a flirty but subtle line.
5. Talking About Things You Own
Here’s an uncomfortable truth: having a little money helps your chances when you’re trying to win a girl over. Many of us may have been taught growing up that wealth doesn’t matter and the only thing important in a relationship is love. That may work in telenovelas, movies and fairy tales, but in the real world, that rarely ever happens.
It may be true that money can’t buy hapopiness, but boy can it take care of everything else. Having good financial capabilities allows you to dress better, offer better gifts, drive a girl home with a more comfortable car, and so forth. We may live in the era of more advanced and liberal democracies, but women have historically chosen their husbands based on his potential to be a good provider to her and her children to come. While that’s not the exact thought process among wmen these days, most women will probably agree that they’ve never dreamed of marrying men poorer than they are.
If you have the advantage of wealth, you’ll want to demonstrate it without necessarily flaunting it. If you do, you risk turning the girl off because it sends the signals that you’re a bag of hot air. When conversing with a girl, don’t talk about your fancy new condo, your sports car or your designer clothes. Instead, interact with her with the most down-to-earth manners that you can display. If you’re really well off, she’ll notice it without you saying.
Having money isn’t the most important thing in a relationship. However, it’s a powerful complementary attribute that’s better used passively. The more that you use it instead of talking about it, the more attractive it will make you in the eyes of a woman.
6. Being Torpe
It’s natural to feel a little nervous around someone that you’re really attracted to. If you don’t have much experience in dating, it’s easy to get intimidated by the person you’re with. The tendency is to become more self-conscious, causing you to stutter, stammer and generally act in a sheepish way in front of a woman. You’ll also be less likely to say anything that will let the girl know for sure how you feel about her because at this point, you’re terrified with the prospect of rejection.
If you have notions that being torpe is cute in any way, shape or form, trust us when we tell youright now that it absolutely isn’t. Most societies evolved through the ages with men playing the role of protectors and providers. The expectation is for us to act in a calm but self-assured manner which projects inner strength. Boottom line: women generally appreciate men who show confidence in the same way that you’d rather have a doctor who’s confident rather than unsure of himself if he’s about to give you surgery.
Being torpe isn’t just unattractive in a man. It also raises the risk of pissing off a woman whoi may like you but has been waiting far too long for you to make a move. Even if she doesn’t get frustrated, you may still be sending her mixed signals which might make her decide that you’re not attracted to her, compelling her to set her sights on someone else.
7. Being Mr. Fix
Men and women are wired differently. By now, you’re probably aware that men tend to lean more towards logic when they make decisions while women are more in touch with the emotional aspects of certain situations. It’s a biological and physiological fact that makes male-female communications so dynamic. Both genders react differently even when presented with the same situation.
Case in point: when a man tells someone about his problems, he wants to blow off some steam while seeking advice and possibly some assistance. If he wasn’t, he probably won’t engage another person in a conversation of that nature because it would seem pointless to do so.
With women, it’s quite different. Typically, women talk about their problems with people whom they have some degree of trust and comfort with. They confide with the emotional release as the point of the exercise. If they get some sensible advice or even some assistance, those are merely bonuses. The point for the ladies is that there’s someone who’ll listen and understand where they’re coming from.
The next time your lady friend talks about a problem, make sure to be a good listener. She’ll appreciate that more than anything else. Of course, you should still ask if there’s anything you can do to help as long as you feel you really can. What you want to avoid is forsaking the listening part and interrupting her with constant advice and offers of assistance.
Keep in mind that came to you to be heard and not to be lectured or be treated like a damsel in distress. The important thing is for you to be the one who understands her and if you can help out, that’s just icing on the cake.
8. Being a Pervert
Look, all romantic relationships will likely lead to sex assuming that things go well. That’s natural and it’s just biology at work. However, that doesn’t mean you should start dropping sexual innuendo on a woman just a few days after meeting her or even on your first date. The time for physical intimacy will come if you play your cards right, but for now it’s best to show her that you have good intentions for her and that you’re not a pervert on the hunt for his next sex object.
While you’re in the getting-to-know stages, keep things nice and platonic. Women appreciate being desired by the men that they love, but that’s usually the case only when they feel secure in the emotional bond between the two of you. If you show strong sexual motives right from the get-go, the woman will understandably think that you’re only after sex – and that you’re a little sick in the head. Maybe both.
The key here is just behaving like a decent human being. Acting like you’re starved for sexual contact makes you look needy and undesirable. By contrast, showing that you can keep your composure and exercise restraint sends signals to a woman that you have discipline and self-control. Most ladies find this sexy and when they start looking at you that way, good things can’t be far behind.
Of course, lady perverts also exist. If the object of your affection is the one initiating the sexual innuendo, all bets are off. As long as the acts that follow are between two consenting adults, it’s all fair game.
And there you have it: the eight biggest behavioral turnoffs for Filipina women. Are there other things that we weren’t able to list here? Let us know in the comments section.