Trying to figure out whether a woman is into you or if she’s just being nice is one of the greatest mysteries known to man. Getting it right allows you to capitalize on the opportunity to either land the girl that you like or at least avoid an embarrassing rejection scene. Getting it wrong, on the other hand, might lead to getting brutally shot down or cause you to miss out on a girl you like and mutually likes you back.
It’s a conundrum that has plagued our forefathers and it continues to be the bane of single men in modern times. You see, the times may have changed but the way the average guy tries to decipher a woman’s signals has remained largely the same. To this day, we try to assess our chances with ladies by relying on logic. Unfortunately, logic often isn’t the best tool when assessing a situation that’s largely emotional and subjective in nature.
The good news? Psychologists agree that there are several telltale signs that a woman gives off when she’s attracted to a man. If you notice a combination of several of the signs mentioned below, there’s a good chance that a lady is waiting on you to make a move. Here are just some of them:
1. The Reset
A woman who’s attracted to you may be very composed and will consciously try to act in a reserved manner. She may be able to carefully control what she says and suppress big movements but it’s very hard for anyone to avoid making smaller gestures that convey their interest in you.
Watch out for movements where she “resets.” These are small movements and mannerisms where she “fixes” up even when it’s unnecessary to do so. Does she fix her blouse every now and then even when it’s not disarranged? Does she fix her hair incessantly even when it’s not a mess? Does she keep fixing her sleeves even when they’re not the least bit out of place? When women are attracted to men, they feel slightly nervous and conscious of how they look at all times, prompting these subtle actions.
The part that might be hard to judge here is the hair reset. A lot of women have the tendency to touch their hair. However, if she flips her hair in such a way that it shows her neck – especially the back of her neck – that’s a major signal that she’s feeling some attraction towards you.
2. Read Her Lips
One of the most wonderful thing about women is that they all instinctively know how to be seductive when they’re attracted to a guy. One of the most common ways they do this is with actions centered around the lips. A woman will touch, bite or pucker her lips from time to time, helping her cope with her internal tension and sending cute signals to you in the process that she’s interested.
3. The Slow Smile
Smiling is a universal sign of cordiality and just because the girl that you like smiles at you doesn’t necessarily mean that she has special interest in you. This is a sign that men misinterpret all the time because to us, smiles are more or less all the same. To women, however, there’s a particular type of smile that can give away how she feels about you.
When a woman looks at you and gives you a slow, discreet smile, it’s usually a sign of flirtation. When accompanied by eye contact that lasts a second or two longer than usual, you might be on to something exciting.
This is particularly true if you and the girl you’re eyeing barely know each other. If this happens in a party or a nightlife spot, it’s very possible that she’s encouraging you to start a conversation. Just make sure she’s not with a boyfriend or a husband to avoid an awkward situation.
4. Open Body Language
When you approach a woman and start a conversation, pay close attention to her body language. Does she face you and display open body language or is her body facing another direction and just turns her head towards you?
Facing you and not having folded arms or holding an object between you and her is an encouraging sign. It subliminally shows that she feels safe around you and is no hurry to find the nearest exit. It also gives you a cue that she’s willing to converse for a while and is interested in what you have to say.
5. Easy Joke Sells
Another reliable litmus test on whether someone likes you is your ability to elicit laughter. Laughing at jokes and other witty remarks is a sign that a person is perceptive towards you and is at ease while doing so. It means that she doesn’t have her guard up and is following your train of thought. More importantly, it shows that they’re not hesitant to show a little emotion – an action that’s associated with putting oneself in a vulnerable spot.
The next time you’re attracted to a woman and are in a conversation, try to poke around with a small joke or two. If she laughs at your attempts at humor, that’s an encouraging sign. If she laughs hard at even borderline non-funny lines, that’s even better. If she does this, there’s a fat chance that she’ll say yes when you eventually ask her out — provided that she’s single, of course.
According to Psychology Today, laughter is a sign of liking the deliverer of jokes even in non-romantic relationships. Even in the workplace, you’re more likely to laugh at the jokes of a colleague that you like. Compare that to when a boss that you have chilly relationships with tries to be funny and you’re likely to ignore it or even give a disapproving response.
But what if you’re just a naturally funny guy? Will it make things tougher for you since you can make almost anyone laugh? Psychologists and dating experts agree that this is actually to your advantage. Funny and witty people can effortlessly put women at ease and once they’ve done so, they can lead conversations into more romantic territory. The ability to keep conversations interesting is usually a stronger determinant of dating success over sheer good looks.
Skin-to-skin touches can also indicate attraction from a woman to a man. In general, humans don’t touch other humans because of our instinctive aversion to germs and the possibility of contracting dirt and diseases. Even when we know someone is clean, we don’t just touch the person unless we have a good level of trust or attraction towards them.
More than men, women tend to use subtle touches to express their liking for a person. When a woman doesn’t hesitate to have her arm brush against yours more than once, touch you in the knee while she’s telling you a story or sneak up from behind to cover your eyes, that’s a strong indicator that she’s at ease around you. More importantly, it’s a signal that she doesn’t find you creepy or disgusting in any way. When a girl regularly shows willingness to touch you and you happen to like her, that’s as green a light as any for you to flirt back.
7. The Call for Help
Normally, people ask for help only from people that they’re comfortable with. With women, this is particularly true. Allowing someone to help means letting him get physically closer to and have verbal interaction. For that reason, women only tend to ask for help from a man they don’t know too well when there’s some attraction involved.
Asking for help in carrying a bag or picking up an object are subtle hints that she wants to flirt with you. A higher level version of this is when a girl asks you to teach her something or for assistance in a project. If you can tell that she’s perfectly capable of doing any of these things herself but asks for your help anyway, it’s a clear sign that she wants to spend a little quality time with you.
8. The Tease
Girls are complex beings. When they’re attracted to men, they sometimes display counter-intuitive behavior to show their interest. Playful teasing and mocking are prime examples of these behaviors. While men assume that a girl who’s attracted to them will be nice all the time, the reality is often quite the opposite.
Many girls will tease you about your clothes or mock you playfully about the way you talk. While this may seem like they’re trying to antagonize you, it’s really about getting your attention or testing you. Other girls even use this as a coping mechanism when they haven’t admitted to themselves that they like you but they’re starting to have that inexplicable attraction towards you. For other girls, this is also a way of playfully testing if you can act cool when faced with something annoying or unexpected.
Use this behavior to your advantage by teasing her back gently. Don’t say anything that might embarrass her especially in front of other people. Instead, fire back with a statement that can potentially catch her off guard. If she tells you that you have dorky hair, tell her something like “you have no idea how many chicks dig it.” If she tells you that you have a beer belly, tell her she shouldn’t mock it cause it cost a fortune in beer money to build it up.
This kind of banter creates sexual tension which makes for more dynamic conversations. If you find yourself frequently in conversations like this with a woman, she most likely is flirting with you and is ready to go on a date with you sooner than later.
9. The Conversation Starter
When you’re not with the girl that you like, does she send you messages via social media or text or are you the one initiating the exchanges? If it’s hard to tell, try not texting sending her messages for a day or two. See if she initiates any interaction. If she does, there’s a good chance that she likes you.
This is particularly true if her messages are about random things or she’s messaging just to ask how you are or why you haven’t been reaching out. Conversely, if her messages are mostly about practical and impersonal things, that’s a red flag. If she doesn’t bother sending messages when you don’t, it might be time to choose another target.
10. Emoji Usage
Unless you’re crushing on a complete jejemon who spams emojis and misspells words like it’s nobody’s business, you should watch how the girl that you like texts or messages. If she texts normally like an adult with most people but increases her smiley usage when she’s talking to you, that’s a sign of flirtation or at the very least, fondness.
11. Proximity in a Group
Many Filipina women are relatively conservative and will not immediately say yes to a date request. Some of them prefer to bide their time and wait until they’re completely sure that they have a solid candidate.
In the absence of a date, you can still tell if a woman is interested in you by being in the company of a social group that includes her. Pay attention to how physically close she is to you. Does she sit or walk right beside you while talking or does she use other members of the group like meat shields so you can’t get too close to her? The former is a good sign, while the latter is an indication that she’s either very shy or that you need to back off.
12. Eagerness to Go Out
When a woman is interested in you and you’ve been acquainted for at least a few days now, you can bet that the thought of going out with you has crossed her mind at least once. Given the social norms here in the Philippines, it’s unlikely that she’ll want to make the first move. She’ll send you indirect signals that she’s interested in you, but it’s up to you to figure them out and be the one to ask first.
When a girl asks you what you do on weekends, where you like to hang out and what type of food you crave for, those are hints that she’s trying to get a feel of what might happen on a first date. If she asks whether you have plans on a particular evening, that’s an even stronger hint that she wants you to ask her out if you’re available.
When you ask her out, you know she’s interested if she says yes without putting up a lot of barriers. In some cases, she might decline if she really has plans on a certain day. However, you know it’s a legitimate excuse when she offers another specific schedule. If she tells you she’s unavailable and doesn’t give a definite alternative, it’s probably time to set your sights on someone else.
13. The Doll Up
If a girl anticipates that you’ll be seeing each other, there’s a good chance she’ll put in some effort to look better than usual. Putting on makeup when it’s not part of her daily routine or dressing to impress on your first date are powerful signals that she wants you to reciprocate her attraction towards you.
Of course, this can be misinterpreted easily when you don’t do your homework on her tendencies. If she’s the “kikay” type, she’ll always be conscious of her how she looks and dresses most of the time. Even when you’re sure that dolling up isn’t part of her routine, you need to make sure she’s not doing it for someone else.
14. The Interview
Believe it or not, successfully asking a girl out on a date is no guarantee that she’s interested in you. Sometimes, women say yes just because they don’t know how to say no to a very persistent guy. On other cases, they might be real players who feign flirtation as a hobby. Whatever the case, you can get a better feel of how much a girl likes you when you get to have longer conversations with her when nobody else is around.
There’s a very good chance that she’s interested in you if she asks about things in your life. Matters relating to your family, career, hobbies and interests are all-time favorite questions of girls who want to get inside a man’s head. She’ll ask about these things so she can decide whether she wants to take things beyond simple attraction and into the next level. It also serves as fodder for the two of you to keep on talking.
On the other hand, it’s a bad sign when the girl seems bored, is always checking her watch or is always sending texts or answering calls while you’re together. This is a sign that she desperately wants time to pass and can’t wait for your date to be over. If you observe this and the conversations between you two don’t quite click, it’s a cue to cut the night short and pick another target. Better to cut your losses early than waste more time and money on someone who’s not interested.
15. Liking What You Like
When a girl likes you, she’ll find ways for you to have more common ground to use as conversation drivers. One way that girls do this is by doing some research on the things that they know you like.
If she starts talking to you about your favorite sports team or if she surprises you with some insight on video games when you know for a fact that she wasn’t interested in those things before, it’s a clear indicator that she’s into you. When she does this, try not to think that she’s being a stalker. It simply means that she’s trying to find indirect ways to become closer to you.
When trying to correctly evaluate your chances with a woman, look for several of these signs to show consistency. When you think you’ve got a legit shot, man up and take your chances by asking her out. Keep in mind that women can lose attraction towards a man just as easily as they gain it. It’s always better to chase after an opportunity rather than to wonder about what-ifs when the opportunity is gone. Even in the event that you get shot down, you can just forget it, deny it or laugh about it. The world is an ocean and one fish not taking your bait doesn’t mean you’re not good at catching them.