If you’re single, meeting new people regularly is key to having a successful dating life. It can happen through your network of friends, through school or even in your workplace. Each of these channels opens up new possibilities, potentially bringing you closer to finally finding the one you’ll want to keep.
Unfortunately, some of us don’t have this luxury. A good number of Pinoy men are either shy, too busy with work to have social lives, or are working in male-dominated fields (think engineering, mining, pier kargadors). Good thing technology has us covered and apps like Tinder allow us to meet potential dates with just a few swipes on our smartphones.
In theory, Tinder dating should be easy. It essentially follows the concept of speed dating where parties who express mutual liking are paired up and allowed to converse. However, we know of many Filipino men who end up frustrated by the app because they can’t seem to get enough matches to help them lanbd several legitimate dates. For that purpose, we conbsulted several Tinder experts and put together this list to help you get the most out of the popular app:
1. Know That It’s an Ocean Out There
Estimates suggest that there are at least 60 million Tinder users around the world. That’s a staggering number and if we follow the logic of population distribution, there could be as many as 32 million women using the app.
That would mean that there are likely thousands of girls looking for a date in your area alone. Maybe hunderds of thousands if you live in a major population center like Metro Manila. It’s a great big ocean of women out there and that means you need to adopt a mentality of abundance if you want to win big.
When at the Discover tab, keep swiping. If the person looks somewhat attractive to you, swipe right. There’s no need to be super uptight with your standards at Tinder because the possibility of a match doesn’t equate to any commitment at all. Even if you get a match with someone whom you decide later on as not being your type, you can always choose not to start a conversation. You can even undo the match and just focus on the others that you like more.
If you get a match with someone you’re attracted to but the conversation just isn’t doing it for you, move on. There are hundreds of women out there looking for a man like you and you can’t get stuck on one just because you like the image you see. The best way to go is to find a great balance of atytractiveness and chemistry with the ladies you interact with.
2. Use High-Resolution Pictures
If you’re anything close to being the typical Filipino male, you’re probably not that fond of taking too many pictures of yourself. Unless you’re a bit on the metrosexual side (nothing wrong with that), you’ll probably be satisfied with uploading a very casual picture of you for all the women in Tinder to see.
The thing is, your main Tinder image is by far the strongest determinant of whether you’ll catch the fancy of women on Tinder or you’ll end up mostly getting ignored. A little effort goes a long way, and you don’t have to do anything out of the ordinary to get a better image up on the app.
Start by using a high-resolution camera. Most smartphones these days take pretty good images. If you can use a DSLR, that’s even better. High-res photos are proven to be noticed by human eyes more easily than their low-resolution counterparts. This gives women a visual cue that they should stop and look more closely at your image before summarily dismissing you and swiping left.
You’ll also want to invest a little on what you’re weaing when the photo is taken. A clean shirt with a neat collar should be fine. If you’re going for a more rugged, bad boy look, a clean, black shrt will suffice. Make sure that the clothes were actually pressed before your quick photoshoot.
Speaking of photoshoots, try not to use an image taken by way of selfie. In Filipino culture, a man taking a selfie just looks a tad off. It gives the subliminal impression to women that you’re a little narcissistic or vain. Keep in mind that selfies 100% look good when women do it, but not quite when it’s men. So much for gender equality.
3. A little Photoshop Never Hurt Anyone
After taking your high-resolution photo, it’s time to do a bit of touching up. Photoshop and other, more user-friendly image editing applications can help you with that. Optimizing the lighting, getting rid of a pimple here, obscuring a wrinkle there – these can make you look as fresh and vibrant as you are when you’re at your best. Note that the operative term here is to enhance your photos and not to completely change your appearance. The goal is to help your picture show the best of what you’ve got and not to misrepresent you in any way.
Of course, when it’s time to meet a girl on a date, you’ll have to live up to your Tinder photo. Living healthy, good grooming practices and dressing up appropriately are all keys to looking your best and not falling short of your date’s expectations.
4. Short, Snappy Bios Work Best
A lot of men don’t think much about what to write on their Tinder bios, thinking that most women never bother to look at this field and simply swipe left or right based only on the picture they see. While there might be some truth in that, you can’t discount the fact that simply getting a Like doesn’t necessarily mean that a woman is into you and that she’ll go out with you for sure. Some women actually exercise their due diligence and check out men’s bios after they’ve been matched. If they don’t like what they see, they can simply hit the Unmatch option.
When writing a bio, try not to look like you’re trying to prove too much. Try not to talk about how good you look, what vehicle you drive, where you work or even which university you went to. Simply mention a couple of interests, what fun things you like to do, and maybe what TV shows you’re currently into. While it’s true that girls find accomplished, highly educated and financially stable men attractive, it’s sexier when they find out without you telling them directly.
Write your bio in 2-3 short sentences. Uf you can be witty while you’re at it, go right ahead and make them smile even beforeyou start conversing.
5. Take the Conversation Off Tinder Quickly
When a leopard catches its prey, it doesn’t stay too long in the killzone. It may take a bite or two, but it drags its meal away and feasts on it atop a tree where other predators can’t steal away its prize.
The same concept applies to Tinder: after getting a match and starting an engaging conversation, do your best not to make the app your dedicated chat box with the lady you’ve connected with. She probably gets lots of matches all the time and other guys will try to start conversations with her, limiting her attention for you. Like a leopard, you need to whisk away the prized catch somewhere wehere you and her can have a bit more exclusivityt.
You can ask her if she wants to talk over the phone., If not, at least get her mobiule number to get her on Viber or SMS. If you feelk comfortable with her and you suspect she feels the same way towards you, you can ask her if she’d like to connect over Facebook or another social media channel. If things go smoothly on these channels as well, you should start thinking about meeting her in person to see if there’s really some chemistry between the two of you.
6. Beware the MLM Mafia
At this point, every adult Filipino male is pretty much aware of multi-level marketing (MLM) and the tactics used by their purveyors to recruit members. Women in your social circles will attempt to set up “coffee” with you and you – in your infinite wisdom – will think it’s some kind of date. When you get to Starbucks (the meetup place of choice for MLM people), you’ll quickly find out that romance is the last item on the agenda. Instead, you’ll be met with some shady offer to start a “business” with themto the tune of tens of thousands of pesos as an initial “investment.”
Eventually, these enterprising women will run out of men in their social circles to try and con sell to. When that happens, they turn to the infinite pool of meetups with men that is Tinder. MLM ladies tend to use really glamorous photos to the point of bannering their bodies in skimpy swimwear just to get you to swipe right. When you match, they’ll jump on the opportunity to chat with you.
These women will poke and prod for information that will give them indications of your financial capabilities. They’ll ask where you’re from, where you work, where you graduated or even what kind of car you drive. Once they have a good idea that their membership fee is within your means, they’ll waste no time in inviting you for a “friendly” cup of coffee. When you finally meet her, pleasantries will be exchanged, but within a few minutes,. She’ll start talking about business opportunities, exerting minimal effort to make money, and seeing her again in future events.
Needless to say, meeting women like these over Tinder is a major waste of time. If a girl seems over-eager, disingenuous or enthusiastic to meet you even if you haven’t formed much of a connection yet, consider those red flags and invest more time in conversing with women who are really on Tinder for dating reasons.
7. Consider Paying for Tinder Gold
If you’re serious about dating, you should really consider paying for Tinder Golkd. This in-app purchase removes the cap of 100 Likes for every 12 hours, allowing you to swipe right as often as you want. Tinder Gold also increases the number of Super Likes you can do per day from 1 to 5, significantly improving the chances of being noticed by a girl who really catches your fancy.
People new to Tinder tend to think that subjectivism and emotional responses are at the core of the app. After all, this is a platform for finding potential partners in romantic relationships. However, the pros know that this notion is only part of the equation. The reality is that even in the art of dating, there’s still some science and math involved. The simple truth is that if you’re able to reach more women, your chances of finding one whom you can start a serious relationship with dramatically increases.
Tinder Gold has the added benefit of showing you which women Liked you but you haven’t Liked back. You may be surprised how many attractive ladies find you visuaklly appealing, and Tinder Gold grants you the power to Like them back. Once the match is made, you’ll get a much easier time conversing with the lady because you already know she thinks you’re good looking.
They say that if you want an omelet, you need to break some eggs. In the case of Tinder, you need to spend a little money to get more honeys. Tinder Gold costs PhP 1,490 for a month, PhP 948.33 per month for six months, and PhP 624.17 per month for 12 months. These rates aren’t exactly chump change but Tinder pros say the returns on investment are more than worth it.
8. Remember: It’s a Dating Game
Perhaps the biggest mistake that men make when using Tinder is that they tend to treat itr more seriously than they should. They view every match as a potential future wife, and that increases the pressure on them to make things work out. Unfortunately, only a small percentage of matches ever become real-life relationships because there’s so much more to romance than liking each other’s looks. Personalities have to click, schedules have to match and proximity has to be manageable for two people to truly hit things off.
When using Tinder, think of it as a game where the reward is meeting people and discovering that you’re an attractive individual in your own right. When you match with a girl, talk to her and be a gentleman. If there’s some chemistry between you, try adding a little flirtation. If that works out for both of you, you can start planning a meetup at some point. However, don’t be too disappointed if that doesn’t happen. Keep in mind that for every match that doesn’t pan out, tere are potentially hundreds of other ladies out there who may be a better fit for you.
And there you have it: our eight big tips on landing a solid date using the Tinder app. If you have any other killer advice on using the platform, let us know in the comments section below.