Whether we admit it or not, what we choose to wear reflects our personality. At the very least, it can tell an observer what someone values. Political correctness be damned, we all judge people for their choice of clothing at different points in our lives.
After all, why else do we dress up for presentations, important meetings, or job interviews? Because we all know, deep down, that our clothing choices matter. And we know full well they affect not just our interactions with others, but our general outlook on life as well.
But while most of us can readily acknowledge our choice shirts, pants and shoes matters, fewer people would say the same about their underwear. After all, assuming you wash your own underwear and don’t live with a significant other, you’re the only one who will actually see your undies.
But believe us – they do matter. They offer insights into our personalities just as much as our outer garments, if not more so. After all, undies are the piece of clothing only your most intimate of intimates get to see. They are a reflection of how you act when you think no one is looking. In a way, undies can be a window into your true self.
Based on the varied experiences of lifestyle experts and the staff here at Bruce Kho (we assume you’re smart enough to know that there are a number of people working on this site) we listed some of the insights someone can glean from your choice of undies below – assuming you actually buy your own underwear.
People who wear nothing but tightey-whiteys are probably somewhat traditional, and lean a bit conservative. They probably belong to an older generation as well. They tend to be practical and stick with what works for them. They definitely never plan to get lucky, or they just DGAF, as we all know tightey-whiteys are generally acknowledged to be the least sexy of all underwear types.
Bright colored briefs
These folks are a little whimsical, and they probably like dressing up in general. They like the idea of being edgy, but they’re not really the sort of people to go all the way when it comes to risk-taking.
A drawer full of black underwear probably indicates someone who appreciates elegance and expects to get laid at least occasionally. They are probably a low-maintenance type as well. After all, black undies will stay presentable long after white ones will start to look a bit unseemly.
These people appreciate freedom and are probably quite laid-back. In a few cases, they may even signal immaturity. Given that trendier types of pants these days are cut somewhat slim, it’s fair to say that these people also wear looser pants, which might mean they’re still firmly in the 2000s style-wise. A lot of women do love a guy in boxers, though and it’s a piece of underwear your significant other may not mind sharing with you.
If a man’s underwear drawer is full of these, they probably consider themselves some sort of alpha male or they aspire to be one. They also like to stay a bit on the safe side, but they definitely dress up knowing they may get lucky. They also probably like wearing slimmer though probably not skin-tight pants– which may indicate maturity in an older guy.
If someone wears these outside of a sporting context, they’re probably an athlete, Eurotrash, or they just like wearing super-tight pants. In any case, they’re probably a wild card and not like most guys you would expect. It’s possible they just like the feel of rough fabric in direct contact with their ass cheeks. Make of that what you will.
We’ve all let loose during ill-planned laundry days. However, someone who chooses to go commando all the time may just be a bit sloppy and unsanitary with their other habits. Or perhaps they just like freedom and even boxers are too constricting for them. They’re definitely as unconventional and rough as the army dudes the style is named for, that’s for sure.
You’re probably an athletic type (or in shape, at least) and are somewhat confident in yourself. You’ve got a healthy amount of ego – some may say too healthy. Like wearers of other types of briefs, you appreciate stability and support in matters both intimate and not-so-intimate. You probably also like to stay trendy – but not too trendy.
These types of undies have all the freakiness of the jockstrap without the support or the implied masculinity. Underwear manufacturers know this, which is why they often come with really wild prints and very little room up front. One must be truly confident in what they have to offer if they have an underwear drawer full of these.
Large text and brand logos
You’re a basic bro. You’re probably a lot of fun to be with, but you like letting other people tell you what to do or what to think. Your friends probably consider you to be absolutely predictable, even when you do the sorts of things that are supposedly wild.
You’re probably busy, hate shopping and have given up on all attempts to look attractive. You are also a bit insensitive because of how busy you are. If you have a significant other, they’re probably devoted to you and can look past your underwear choices, but believe us, they wish you would up your game just a bit.
Obviously, a person’s choice of underwear can only tell you so much about them. Context matters. Some people also just don’t really put that much thought into their undies, because honestly it’s not really the most important thing in the world to think about.
You can rest assured, however, that these generalizations are probably more accurate than your horoscope, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator or those fake news posts your annoying relatives share on Facebook.
What tips can you share to up someone’s underwear game? Are you even playing the underwear game? Well, why not? Tell us in the comments below.